Friday, October 4, 2019

WE ARE LONELY- HOW YOU CAN HELP A MILITARY SPOUSE-MILITARY LIFESTYLE 5

I don't think. Anyone does. That I don't think. Anyone signs a paper and says okay here. We go I'm going to be alone. All the time and raising my kids by myself all the time and doing everything alone. All the time that's just not.

It is so that's just not a really nice thing to say so please don't ever say. That and also don't ask. If they will have to go over again are. They home for good well. They have to go over again. Because it's the military that's their job they're. Most likely going to deploy again somewhere it's not a one-shot deal. They don't just go. One time and that's it they will continue to go for as long as. They are in the military and in most cases so that's I mean.

I don't think people ask. That in in in a like bad way at all I think they're just genuinely curious but it does bother. Because from our point of view it's like again like our heart sings like yes. They are gonna have to go in and this like we're reminded of it so it's just polite. I guess not to ask. That so yeah.

This is pretty short basic to the point but those are. Some things. That you can do to help out military family and this goes for my girls out there that's husbands aren't in the military but they are way for their jobs. They are alone. All week or maybe for months on end. It gets really really lonely and really hard to be locked in a house with your kids. All day long let. Me tell you it's like. It will drive a person mad for real so definitely check up on those friends.

You know if they're not necessarily a close friend maybe. You know them from church or you know them maybe they're like a second cousin and you you follow them on Facebook or something check in on them.

Because you never know what they're going through and how far just simple. How are you can take them thank you guys so much for watching don't forget to subscribe don't forget to hit. That notification bell and make sure. That you have. It set to notify. You every time. I upload I think by default. It only does occasionally so.

We want to make sure. That you have. It set for all uploads. You aren't subscribed already. I would love to have. You and I will see. You guys in my next video bye. I wanna get to your clothes gotta get. It right now. I wanna push. All the limits with. You right so. What you feel things to see. This cream and with a comment come tonight.

WE ARE LONELY- HOW YOU CAN HELP A MILITARY SPOUSE-MILITARY LIFESTYLE 4

When he's coming home and three. It just kind of reminds. Us of like especially. We have a significant amount of time until. They do come home it's reminds. Us of that so those are a few things.

That some of the ladies suggested. That I mentioned in this video and I do agree with them so. We went ahead and put them in here okay so. Another one that was submitted by. Some of the ladies over on Instagram was to send gift baskets and gift cards encouragement dips and encouraging things and that's not like we're asking for your money or a charity but it would be so nice to receive in the mail just a surprise just.

Because I'm thinking of you I care about you I'm here for you. Whether it be like Bath & Body stuff to pamper ourselves or gift card to go eat or whatever it may be but just letting us know that you care by sending little gifts or things like. That in the mail. If it's just a handwritten letter just the simplest things could really brighten up our whole week. Another thing is if. You are local coming over and watching a movie with.

That person definitely. If your spouse's home or you have. Someone that can watch your kids and they could do. That and then. You could come over to our house for example my house and my kids are in bed and we could have. Some adult time which is much much much needed. When you're in this situation.

Because you're around your kids 24/7 with no break and no adult interaction so coming over in the evening after a bedtime and watching a movie maybe having some wine. Something like. If it's just Girl Talk. That could go along okay. Another one is something not to do and this was again submitted by the ladies over on Instagram and that is that do not ever tell. That we signed up for this please don't ever say.

That I don't understand. Anybody could say. That with good intent. Because it just sounds ugly coming out of my mouth. We definitely did not sign up for this. That is for sure. We loved whatever our situation may be. Whether we came into. It knowing they were in the military or whether. They got in the military after. We were married. We definitely did not sign up to live our lives alone.

WE ARE LONELY- HOW YOU CAN HELP A MILITARY SPOUSE-MILITARY LIFESTYLE 3

Many tears are shed on this side of things. That you don't know about it is so hard and while. I might put on a good front. I am overwhelmed. It is really hard doing it all by yourself. While you're worried sick about your spouse and all.

 That goes into. That so ask. You can help. You are far away can. You a meal or better. Yet don't ask just send to me I'll send a gift card to get pizza or subway or anything you can get a gift card for everything now. They send a gift card to get coffee. You are in the location of the person. You can drop dinner by again just say hey can.

I make dinner for you guys tonight offer to babysit the kids better. Yet don't offer to babysit the kids tell them you are babysitting the kids say hey Saturday night I'm watching the kids. You know make plans but this is what you're doing or um just can.

I come over and help. You with anything do. You need help with the yard work do. You need do. You need anything like around the house done. That a man could do like changing a light bulb that's really high or anything outdoors. I can have my husband come over and do. That for you and I'll sit and visit with. You anything like. That but we do get overwhelmed so don't assume. We don't just. Because it may not seem like. It but offer to help in any way. That you can number three. This was one that was suggested by a few ladies.

 I asked and I do agree with. It and that is please don't ask. If we've heard from them and don't ask. When they're coming home don't ask. If we've watched the news. That is a big. One instantly instantly. That will strike fear in our heart. If you've asked. Us have you heard from him have. You watched the news I've had.

This happen to me it was horrible. I know people don't do. It with bad intentions they're just not thinking but if. You put yourself into our shoes. You could probably almost immediately understand why that's not a good thing to say but don't ever ask a military spouse. If she's heard from her husband. If she's seen the news and don't ask. When he's coming home. Because one we most likely can't tell. When he's coming home anyways -. We probably don't know.

WE ARE LONELY- HOW YOU CAN HELP A MILITARY SPOUSE-MILITARY LIFESTYLE 2

We are sending us a funny meme sending us a funny video asking if there's anything you can do asking how. We are being someone just to talk to like hey would. You like to schedule a time. This week I'd love to call. You and see. What you've been up to we get very very lonely and I know personally.

I get very lonely and I know. That all of you two as well. That was the number. One thing almost a hundred percent of you said. You said something else stay in touch. We get lonely so the number. One thing you can do for a military spouse. You know you have. One in your family maybe your neighbor. Something like.

That is to keep them company in one way or another but just let them know that you're there for them and you're thinking about that you can invite them over for dinner invite them out for dinner which is even better invite them to do. Something with your family make plans to do an activity again. You are not there.

We can physically do. Something for them sending them regular messages just checking in on them sending them a funny snap on snapchat or Instagram or whatever it doesn't always have to be. How are you or just checking in I know that can be redundant and you probably feel like you're not doing much but you're doing a lot. Sometimes some social medias can help to find a job, if you need cv - look at the resume examples - https://edujobssearch.com/.

Because you don't know that you could be the only person who has reached out to us in a week or more and that's honestly the sad truth but that's just. It is so definitely consistently keep in touch with. Us so number two is we get overwhelmed.

Most of us are really really good at hiding that you would never know. I get told all the time. You are so strong. I could never do. It but what you don't know is what goes on behind the scenes.

WE ARE LONELY- HOW YOU CAN HELP A MILITARY SPOUSE-MILITARY LIFESTYLE 1

Hey guys welcome back to my channel. If you're new I'm Jessica so as. Many of you know. We are a military family and I do get asked a lot of what can. I do for you. How can you I get told thank you for your service a lot which I truly appreciate and I want to tell. You guys you don't know. This already. It is so nice and well received from a military spouse. You tell them thank you for their service. Because although.

We are not the service member ourselves we definitely play a huge role in this whole thing because we're the ones back here taking care of everything and it's really hard so definitely thinking us is such a nice gesture. That you can make so. I just want to say thank you to all of you. That do that for me I really do appreciate. I get asked a lot. What can I do to help is there. Anything that I can do for your husband is there. Anything I could do for you so. I sat down and made a list of things. That I feel like people could do to help out military families and then. I also asked a lot of you ladies on Instagram for ideas as well and I will tell.

That I got an overwhelming response and 99% of y'all's answers was the same thing and that's gonna be the first. One on my list. It was the first. One on my list anyways and then. I read y'all's comments and of course. You all had different versions of what that meant to you so the number. One thing you can do to help a military family is to check in on them stay and touch. This can mean so. Many things. If you're far away it's totally understandable. That you can't come over and just hang out with. Us you can't help. Us in any physical sort of way but just calling us texting us sending us a message seeing how.